Siblinghood

From an early age, she knew her little sister was feminine. In their suburban Texas community, she and her family knew of resources for families of gay and lesbian children, but not resources for families of trans children.  

From the age of 10, she felt a little hurt and grieved that she was losing her little brother. In reality, she was losing a brother she never had. Allyship is not an immediate thing. It takes time.

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Transcript

music  0:00  

[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "Oh let's build, let's build a place we can go”]

Narrator  0:09  

Thank you for tuning into kin•dom campfire chats, a podcast of kin•dom community. This podcast features the voices of LGBTQIA+ persons, both youth participants and adult staff, who attended kin•dom camp in Texas in the summer of 2024. We asked the camp participants to think of a question that they wished someone would ask them about their life journey. With a friend, and in their own words, the campers tell their stories of struggle, love, support, and a community found. We invite you to listen with an open mind and an open heart.

music  0:50  

[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "This is the place”]

speaker 1  0:56  

Okay. The question is, what is it like to have a trans sister? 

speaker 2  1:00  

So I often like to joke that my sister saw her birth certificate and was like, "no", because she was the first trans person, transgender person, any of us have ever met. She really at no point I can say specifically in her life, was ever masculine. So being from, you know, suburban Texas, and in the early 2010s, when I feel like most people were still, I mean, semi familiar with the LGBT movement, but less about the tea so. But for a good bit, I'd say from six to seven years old, my sister was, I would guess, like your typical boy, except not really. I mean, she would always steal my toys and play with my dresses and whatever, whatever. And my parents were very supportive. There was never a moment where they were ever against it. They were just more confused, because obviously, there was no resources, no real advocacy at this time, for having, you know, a young transgender child. 

For me personally, though, it took me a little while to get around to it. And I don't talk about this a lot specifically, because obviously, I'm very supportive of my sister. And also I was like, what 10 I didn't really fully understand it. I just knew that for me at the time, it felt like I was losing a brother, but really, in reality, I was losing a brother I'd never had, because my sister was never, ever my brother, really. I just suppose I had it in that thought, and I suppose there was this grievance I had around it. I was really confused, and I felt a little hurt. It sounds weird, and I feel like it's important why I talk about that is sometimes when you're in the LGBT community, it's hard to understand, why would people feel this way? Why would people not like me for who I am? And sometimes there's just confusion or just fear, and my parents ended up taking me to a professional, and I was able to, kind of like talk about those emotions, process that, and be able to understand that this is just part of my sister's bigger journey, and that in reality, I wasn't losing a brother, I was gaining a sister, and I, you know, I've always been supportive. I think not always, but I think it took me a while to get around to it, and now I'm bisexual, so I guess it got a little to me as well. But I think it's important to know that, like, allyship is not an immediate thing. It takes time. And I think it took time for me. But the end of the day, she's my sister. No matter what. You know, I don't see her in any other way. If anything, I just see her as a partial annoyance at times, but that's just sibling hood, and I love her for who she is.

music  3:58  

[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "Oh let's build”]

Baylee  4:05  

Hi y'all, it's Baylee. I'm the Creative Director of kin•dom community. I’d like to talk a little bit more about kin•dom camp and how you can get involved. kin•dom camp is an opportunity for LGBTQIA+ youth ages 12 to 17 to feel safe and free to show up as their full selves. Campers will have the chance to experience traditional camp activities and recreation, plus some specialized programming to incorporate LGBTQIA+ history and culture. More information can be found on our website kindomcommunity.org/camp. If you have any questions you can't find the answers to, you can email us at kindomcamp@gmail.com.

Thanks for listening to kin•dom campfire chats. We are proud to be a safe space for these campers, and we are even more proud of them for sharing their stories. We hope you'll keep gathering around the campfire with us as we celebrate all of the stories that make us this kin•dom community.