Episode 19 - Vignettes from a Cabin

In kin•dom campfire chats, we asked camp participants to think of a question that they wish someone would ask them about their life journey. With a friend and in their own words, the campers tell their stories of struggle, love, support, and a community found. 

Episode 19:
Camper 1 - 13 yo - She/They
Camper 2 - 14 yo - He/Him
Camper 3 - 14yo - He/Him
Camper 4 - 15yo - He/Him

Short conversations from four campers in the same cabin.
"Complicated in my brain."
"A wave of joy and freedom."
"I don't have to mask as much."
"Try to be safe in whatever situations we are in."

Find out more about us by visiting our website, kindomcommunity.org. There you can find information about kin•dom camp and consider supporting our work with a one-time or recurring donation. Be sure to follow us on Facebook and Instagram @kindomcommunity to keep up with all the important information.

Transcript

music  0:00  
[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "Oh let's build, let's build a place we can go”]

Narrator  0:01  
Thank you for tuning in to kin•dom campfire chats, a podcast of kin•dom community. This podcast features the voices of LGBTQIA+ persons, both youth participants and adult staff, who attended kin•dom camp in Texas in the summer of 2023. We asked the camp participants to think of a question that they wish someone would ask them about their life journey. With a friend and in their own words, the campers tell their stories of struggle, love, support, and a community found. We invite you to listen with an open mind and an open heart.

music  0:50  
[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "This is the place”]

speaker 1  0:55  
What is it like to be a queer person with ADHD and autism?

speaker 2  0:59  
Um, it can get kind of complicated sometimes because like, with– with the ADHD and the autism, like, my brain will just get super confused. And I miss, like– I'll just say, like, the wrong pronouns for myself. And I'm like, wait... because I just forget that that's what I decided on. And I never, like, I never actually felt fully female, but I never felt fully male. And I never felt fully like non binary, which is kind of where I figured out that she/her is a thing. I mean, not she/her, she/they. See? Told you. But the like it, it gets complicated. And like, I'm really awkward. So that kind of makes having crushes even worse, because like, you're trying to be subtle and not awkward. And instead you just end up being awkward, although it gets really complicated sometimes because like it, my brain just will just wander off or I'll be nonverbal. And I just, yeah, it gets weird.

music  2:02  
[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "Oh let's build”] 

Speaker 3  2:08  
What's the strongest emotion you've ever felt? 

speaker 1  2:11  
The strongest emotion I've ever felt was when I was on the phone with my gender care specialist and he announced, "we have the approval, we can get you testosterone." And that's when the shots came in and I was able to get hormones. And it was a wave. It was some sort of wave of joy and freedom, like absolute freedom and liberation. From you know, I felt like I was stuck in a box and that these like life changing medications were the only way that I could get out. And I finally got them. And it was it was so freeing that I went outside and I cried and I screamed, I screamed swear words. I screamed at the world. I screamed everything that I could because I was saying "I did it." I actually did it despite all of the laws happening, despite everyone– everyone's transphobia towards me, I did it and I got the medications that I needed. So it was just so overwhelming. And I recorded videos on myself screaming and telling my friends and I just felt so powerful.

Speaker 3  3:26  
That's amazing. So after taking testosterone, what has it been like? Like, how does it affect you?

speaker 1  3:34  
Um, well, the main thing I do is I feel a lot more emotion, but I can't cry. So that's a big side effect is that a lot of people find that they can't cry. And I can't cry very often. But you know, I've grown a lot, like, hairier, you know a lot sweatier. All the typical typical cis male things were starting to blossom, and my voice has dropped. My upper octaves have sort of faded, so now I can't, I can't like sing very well and I can't like scream very well, just things like that. But I'm confident that they'll return because that's how male puberty works is that their upper octaves go and then they get them back after the voice drops. So overall, it's just been a very positive experience. Very, you know, I have more masculine features now and it feels amazing.

Speaker 3  4:31  
Yeah, you get to go through puberty with all the other dudes. 

speaker 1  4:35  
Yeah, exactly. Yep.

music  4:39  
[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "Oh let's build”] 

speaker 2  4:43  
Okay, so how has your life changed since you found out about the LGBTQIA+ community?

Speaker 3  4:49  
Uh, it's actually been a lot better because I feel like sometimes when people say "oh LGBTQ+ community," they assume that like you're already sort of accepted, but you need to find the groups that you fit into. So for me, as someone who falls under the neurodivergent, like spectrum, I guess, or line, uhm, I find that it's actually really nice here at camp because there are other people like me, I don't have to mask as much, because I'm gonna admit masking has sort of become a habit. So I still do mask. But it's better because I can find people that relate to my experiences in life. We all are individually, individual, so we all have different experiences. But there are people who have similar experiences. So it's nice to be able to bond over that. And just find friends who have the same interest as you and you know, that they're a safe person to go to. So it's definitely gotten better. Plus, just my understanding of myself has gotten so much better. I'm gender fluid, I usually use they/them, but I'm using he/him today. So that's nice, because I have people that like, know what I'm talking about and aren't just like "huh?" and then give you the blank stare. So it's actually gotten like, a lot easier. I feel more supported. Definitely feel safer than anywhere else. I think it's gotten better.

music  4:53  
[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "Oh let's build”] 

speaker 1  6:07  
Why does your pansexual friend get along with you so well?

Speaker 4  6:11  
Probably, because not a lot of people really recognize this since I am straight. And I'm not like trans or bi or anything. In that I'm asexual and we both have the same, neurodivergent ideas and stuff. Except our ways of acknowledging it are severely different. But we get along really well. And we both– both really support each other and try and make sure that we're safe in whatever situations we are in.

speaker 1  6:56  
What made you decide to come to kin•dom camp?

Speaker 4  6:59  
Well, my mom found a camp that was made for LGBTQIA+, and it really made me want to find out what other people could be like me. And my mom gave me a choice between an autistic camp and a, a LGBTQIA+, which was kin•dom camp. And I chose kin•dom camp because I felt like it would be even more affirming to be here. And also, there's some people at those types of camps that might not agree with LGBTQIA+. So that's why I chose to come to kin•dom. 

music  7:51  
[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "Oh let's build, let's build a place we can go”] 

Narrator  8:02  
Thank you for listening to kin•dom campfire chats. This podcast is a production of kin•dom community. You can find out more about kin•dom community by going to kindomcommunity.org or by searching @kindomcommunity on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube.

Speaker 1  8:27  
Hi y'all, it's Baylee. I'm the Creative Director of kin•dom community.

Andy  8:32  
And I'm Andy, the Program Director of kin•dom community.

music  8:36  
I'm John the executive director of kin•dom community.

Speaker 1  8:39  
We wanted to talk a little bit more about kin•dom camp and how you can get involved.

Andy  8:44  
kin•dom camp is an opportunity for LGBTQIA+ youth ages 12 to 17 to feel safe and free to show up as their full selves. Campers will have the chance to experience all the fun that camp has to offer in a week filled with affirmation, community, and celebration. This camp is intentionally created to be affirming space. It affirms all genders, sexualities, identities, and varieties of belief. The only thing we expect is a commitment to welcoming and celebrating everyone where they are as they are. 

Baylee  9:13  
And this isn't just any summer camp – we're talking rainbows and glitter everywhere. kin•dom camp will include plenty of traditional camp activities and recreation, plus some specialized programming to incorporate activities and conversations around mental health, yoga, embodiment, and LGBTQIA+  history and culture. Now more than ever, LGBTQ youth are in need of unconditional love and acceptance. kin•dom camp is a space for just that. 

John  9:43  
We're always looking for fully affirming, welcoming, and loving adults to help us make kin•dom camp a success. This will be a wonderful opportunity to connect with, mentor, and learn from our youth. But most importantly, we ask that you are ready to celebrate everyone where they are, as they are.

Andy  10:01  
Both registration for campers and applications to be on camp staff are now open. You can find these links on our website kindomcommunity.org/camp. If you have any questions you can't find the answers to, you can email me at Andy at kingdomcommunity.org.

Speaker 1  10:16  
Also, be sure to check us out on socials @kindomcommunity on Instagram and Facebook. We post all of our important announcements and fun camp moments so you'll want to follow along.

John  10:27  
Thanks for listening to kin•dom campfire chats. We are proud to be a safe space for these campers and we are even more proud of them for sharing their stories. We hope you'll keep gathering around the campfire with us as we celebrate all of the stories that make us this kin•dom community.

music  10:46  
[Andy strumming guitar & Baylee's voice singing: "Oh let's build”] 

Transcribed by https://otter.ai